(Warning this is kind of long)
So I came home earlier than expected. I left Sunday afternoon to Methodist Hospital in Indianapolis. I stayed the first night in a hotel room because I didn’t check in till Monday morning at 8:00AM. I had my grandma and my mother-in-law with me, they stayed in Methodist Towers Hotel that had a skywalk on the third floor so you didn’t have to go outside to get to the hospital. It was still a really long walk though, and they got lost trying to get my room A LOT! I got checked in and hooked up to the machines really fast. The glue they used to stick the EEG wires to me smelled like I was in a closed in room with a ton of bottles of open rubber-cement glue! Ew… (Attached at pictures my grandma took, the last one she took while I was asleep she said I looked so cute holding my tiger, she’s nuts I know. That tiger is like my comfort thing, Jon gave it to me our first Valentines day together.)
Anywho! I liked the nurses they were sweet to me. I had a little black button that I pressed whenever I felt a seizure coming on, and there was a camera on me ALL the time. I had to unplug it a couple times because it was super sensitive and everytime I bumped it it went off and people came a running in. When I was having a seizure they would hold on to my arm that had the IV in it and it hurt like hell, I wanted them to let go! They kept saying "You're ok" and I told my grandma if I could talk during a seizure I would of said "I'm having a seizure do I look okay to you!" I have a horrible short fuse! My mother-in-law told me they just did that to calm me down, and I told her that they weren't calming me down they were ticking me off! She just laughed until she realized I was serious. Plus for people that work with people who have seizures they didn't do a whole lot. Like sometimes my tongue cuts off my air in my throat so I have to be turned onto my side so I can breathe, and they just left me on my back! I had some seizures while I was there, I don’t feel like they got enough information though, and they didn’t do any blood work. I past the time with my books, and I had a 30” flat screen TV, so I watched the only DVD I had with me, The 10th Kingdom.
Whenever someone important came into my room to talk to me, of course my grandma wasn’t there. I need her there for stuff like that because she always thinks of a million questions I wouldn’t of thought of in a million years, but of course when the doctor came in Tuesday to talk to me and tell me what they had found out of course grandma was lost! They told me my seizures weren’t epileptic. They said they were caused by stress! Of all the million little things it could be they say it’s stress! Well no one in my family except my mother-in-law thinks it’s right. One of the doctors there said that over time I’m like a glass of water and everything that happens to me is like another drop in the glass, and my glass just over flowed and my body delt with it by having seizures. I just looked at her, and was like are you serious? Needless to say I hate that Hospital and I don't like a lot of the people there, but some of them I did like.
So my neurologist will get the test results within a week, and he’ll either want to see me sooner than my appointment which is January 6th. Then he’ll recommend me to a mental health doctor to help me deal with my stress to stop the seizures. After the doctors left I was so ticked off, Jon’s mom didn’t know how to deal with me. They told me to stop taking my valium as needed and take it once a day and take more if I feel more stress. So their plan is to keep me doped up on Valium…
So I looked it up on google and I have Psychogenic NonEpileptic Seizures. It’s a tough topic because people used to think people with this were faking to get attention. Usually seizures like this happen when you have a loss of a loved one or something that’s a drastic change, or being sexually or physically abused. All the big stuff that made me go into depression happened 10 years ago when dad died and all over again 7 years ago when my grandpa died so why would these seizures happen now? In the last few years I did have big changes, 2007 I graduated high school, started beauty school, and got married, 2008 I graduated beauty school and started my first job, 2009 I had to quit my job because the pain of my endometriosis was too much to bare anymore. So I don’t know what’s going to happen now. Hopefully with the right medicine and I guess therapy I’ll get better, hopefully. Lets just pray this is the right diagnosis and I’ll get better soon! Because me being sick isn’t just stressful with me, it’s put a toll on everyone close to me. It’s a lot to worry about. Thank god my husband is so strong to stick by me, and I got a great family and some awesome friends to love me and support me.
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